fancy food gone wrong – Food Gone Wrong

Strawberry Chardonnay Cheddar

cheese gone wrong, fancy food gone wrong

Friends, this has gotten out of control. Now, I like pink as much as everyone. A hot summer is made more bearable by a glass of rosé. Pink hair can be kind of punk. And cupcakes? Well, I’m glad that particular trend for tasteless sugar bombs seems to be dying out, but at least you were never surprised by them. You got cupcakes because you went into an overpriced cupcake store and bought them. Cupcakes did not surprise you by appearing inside paella pans or biryanis. You had to want them.

But now we have a cheddar cheese which can only have been made because someone thought cheddar itself was not good enough. Cheddar had to be like a cupcake and a glass of rosé at once. Otherwise it wouldn’t be “fancy”. Seriously, how hard is it to eat cheddar? Is it that unbearable for the adult palate? What kind of cheddar does your “artisanal” company make that you think it could be improved by putting pink fruit bits in it?

Okay, I’m going to go sit in the corner and breathe deeply now.

Thanks to Nicola for this impressive find. So fancy. Much fancy.

Deconstructed Caesar salad

A fancy restaurant’s version of a Caesar salad. I think the anchovy saw the limp lettuce and just lost the will to live. How convenient that a brick-sized crouton was there to catch it.

(Thank you to Sarahbeth of the wonderful Yelibelly Chocolates — she politely ate this dish, but she’d like the record to note that she did not make it.)

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Veg dinner

catering gone wrong, fancy food gone wrong, Uncategorized, vegetables gone wrong

It’s hard catering for large groups. Not only do you have to produce a lot of edible and hot food fast, but then there are people with special requests. You know, like vegetarians, that obscure sect. But this caterer figured out a way around their complicated needs. Instead of coming up with yet another entree, why not just boil some vegetables and drizzle balsamico on them? The drizzle makes fancy.

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Psychedelic Fish

fancy food gone wrong, fish gone wrong, food serving gone wrong, restaurant food gone wrong

I thought I was ordering a fish-and-potato dish in this lovely Berlin restaurant. I think they actually caught and served me the Little Mermaid in a pool of her own plasma.

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Flight of salts

fancy food gone wrong, food snobbism gone wrong

This was in a Gasthof (hotel and restaurant) in southern Germany. For a couple Euros extra, you could have the steak served with a flight of flavoured salts. Estragon, lavender, chamomile, rose, fennel, choco-chilli… on steak. The steak was actually fantastic on its own, but the salt tasting suggests sometimes people should quash creativity. Namely, the chef’s.

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